Single parenting is not easy, having access to both parents is a child’s right.


By James C Kilasi

A man or woman must not be compelled to marry the person he or she procreates with before marriage.

Marriage is a tough institution to be in and ever since the exit of vinyls, ladies raising kids alone has become a norm.

But even as the gender gap in the work place is very slowly closing, the parenting roles are still different and very distinct.

No matter how much money you make as a woman, there are still things that you can’t teach your son or your daughter.

The opposite is also true.

It is imperative that we tell these young men and women who are not yet parents and are following our lives online the truth.

Parenting solo is not easy.

Let’s tell them that while there is nothing wrong with being an unmarried parent, you will be taking away from your child if you deliberately keep the other parent out of their lives – that is unless the other parent is unfit.

And stop believing that fatherhood or motherhood must be earned from you.

That the other parent must do this or the other for you to be allowed to see their child.

Think of it from the child’s perspective.

Having access to both parents is their right. Don’t take it away from them.

You may not like the other parent but because you chose this person to be your child’s other parent, then it is your duty to allow them space to play this role. If they do not want to, actively seek out mentors of that gender for your child.

A child is not a volcanic stone which will never grow.

Barrack Obama came looking for his father’s roots. The child you are alienating from the other parent will do likewise.

And you, the narcissist, will blame it on witchcraft.


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